Poo-saster
My husband likes these combi words. You take two ordinary words and create your own. I find them silly but often very useful in describing something quickly. This is obviously a combination of Poo and Disaster.
I can see some of you smiling already, but to add to the story I must preface this with some background (see * for footnote/commentary): I was, and still am, an obsessively clean person. I am not sure if it's the Japanese in me, but I was one of those people that when you came to my place, everything was in perfect order, there were never dishes in the sink, and I smelled like roses. Well that last part I just made up but the point is I have some cleanliness issues.
When we moved into our lovely home and I inherited two children and welcomed a wonderful husband, I also opened the door to a wealth of mess that my OCD brain was not readily prepared for and much like any control freak I tried everything in my power to control it, manage it etc. I can't tell you the experience I have when things are a mess, it's beyond just being annoyed but I truly obsess about it if I am not careful. However, through the forces of nature and a baby, let's just say things have changed. I still obsess but not in the same debilitating way that I did before.
This now being said, I can share. My daughter has been fighting 'something' all week. Runny nose, coughing, and finally today she spiked a fever. This is usually an indicator that she may puke in the near future. Puking I have a hard time with, since A) it freaks the hell out of me and B) it's hard to clean up. She did not, much to my relief. However after starting to take a turn for the better, she came up to my husband and said 'I poo poo' (she is mid-stream potty training, so is at the announcing it stage). She had on a pull up, which all of us know holds about 1/4 cup of water and poo just seems to break down the whole infrastructure so you need to really move when they say this. Which is what they are designed for, I realize this. Please diaper companies don't reply. So husband checks for said poo (sometimes they say it but not quite) and sure enough not only has she poo'd but it's clear we have a biohazard/ waste management issue on our hands.
Husband whisks daughter to bathroom while I follow with paper towels trying to understand the exact consistency of the waste material. (did you ladies ever think, while saying your vows that you would ever look at that same man and ask 'well is it runny poo, or just sticky poo??' ) Consistency dictates clean up equipment thus the inquiry. We soon realize, it is well- everywhere.
Now I want a quick aside here- I don't know what it is when a biohazard event happens (this pretty much means any internal fluids find themselves external) but I think most of us go into supermom mode. I am not gagging or freaking out or grossed out beyond function. Okay maybe a little of the latter, but I get into "Fix it mode". Looking back I think 'ewww' and telling my 8 year olds the story later, I realize 'man that was really gross'.
Now for a regular person, who doesn't like poo on their floor or person this is a tiring gross exercise of clean up. But let me shed some light for you, for the obsessive clean freak (which I will refer to now as the OCC, obsessive compulsive cleaner) this is more than just a mess- I use the term biohazard with reason. I FEEL that way, I now have in my head that there is feces all around and I need to get rid of it.
I recently purchased a steam cleaner that also does hard floors, and it is part of my OCC toolkit. So with this I then spent the next hour, steam cleaning the hardwood floors, the rug (Resolved first), and then myself (not with the steamer of course.) I think the most amusing thing about this was I was just getting ready to scrub down our ovens when this occurred. We have self-cleaning ovens btw, but I think they get cleaner when I do it. OCC.
I really almost forgot the zen in all of this. There is you know, it was harder to find today though. I used the answer 'maybe' in my last post which is an allusive hint to a zen story about this farmer who has a bunch of stuff happen to him and despite the good and the bad he always replies with "maybe" rather than "oh yeah, that just sucks" or "I know, I'm so happy!". I find this story very helpful in situations like this. Her pooing was not a nice thing, but after the incident her demeanor started to change for the better. So maybe it was a good thing. Cleaning all that up to the extent that I did is something I need to overcome and work through. So maybe it's a good exercise in letting go and instead of stressing I used the time as walking meditation, trying not to think that my living room was a biohazard area and should be quarantined. I thought more about the water flowing through that wonderful steamer and taking away the yuckiness and trying to well- let go.
* if you are looking for a blog that gets straight to the point and tells the story, this is not the blog for you. I spend A LOT of time having asides, commentary, etc. but I hope it adds to the humor of the post.
I can see some of you smiling already, but to add to the story I must preface this with some background (see * for footnote/commentary): I was, and still am, an obsessively clean person. I am not sure if it's the Japanese in me, but I was one of those people that when you came to my place, everything was in perfect order, there were never dishes in the sink, and I smelled like roses. Well that last part I just made up but the point is I have some cleanliness issues.
When we moved into our lovely home and I inherited two children and welcomed a wonderful husband, I also opened the door to a wealth of mess that my OCD brain was not readily prepared for and much like any control freak I tried everything in my power to control it, manage it etc. I can't tell you the experience I have when things are a mess, it's beyond just being annoyed but I truly obsess about it if I am not careful. However, through the forces of nature and a baby, let's just say things have changed. I still obsess but not in the same debilitating way that I did before.
This now being said, I can share. My daughter has been fighting 'something' all week. Runny nose, coughing, and finally today she spiked a fever. This is usually an indicator that she may puke in the near future. Puking I have a hard time with, since A) it freaks the hell out of me and B) it's hard to clean up. She did not, much to my relief. However after starting to take a turn for the better, she came up to my husband and said 'I poo poo' (she is mid-stream potty training, so is at the announcing it stage). She had on a pull up, which all of us know holds about 1/4 cup of water and poo just seems to break down the whole infrastructure so you need to really move when they say this. Which is what they are designed for, I realize this. Please diaper companies don't reply. So husband checks for said poo (sometimes they say it but not quite) and sure enough not only has she poo'd but it's clear we have a biohazard/ waste management issue on our hands.
Husband whisks daughter to bathroom while I follow with paper towels trying to understand the exact consistency of the waste material. (did you ladies ever think, while saying your vows that you would ever look at that same man and ask 'well is it runny poo, or just sticky poo??' ) Consistency dictates clean up equipment thus the inquiry. We soon realize, it is well- everywhere.
Now I want a quick aside here- I don't know what it is when a biohazard event happens (this pretty much means any internal fluids find themselves external) but I think most of us go into supermom mode. I am not gagging or freaking out or grossed out beyond function. Okay maybe a little of the latter, but I get into "Fix it mode". Looking back I think 'ewww' and telling my 8 year olds the story later, I realize 'man that was really gross'.
Now for a regular person, who doesn't like poo on their floor or person this is a tiring gross exercise of clean up. But let me shed some light for you, for the obsessive clean freak (which I will refer to now as the OCC, obsessive compulsive cleaner) this is more than just a mess- I use the term biohazard with reason. I FEEL that way, I now have in my head that there is feces all around and I need to get rid of it.
I recently purchased a steam cleaner that also does hard floors, and it is part of my OCC toolkit. So with this I then spent the next hour, steam cleaning the hardwood floors, the rug (Resolved first), and then myself (not with the steamer of course.) I think the most amusing thing about this was I was just getting ready to scrub down our ovens when this occurred. We have self-cleaning ovens btw, but I think they get cleaner when I do it. OCC.
I really almost forgot the zen in all of this. There is you know, it was harder to find today though. I used the answer 'maybe' in my last post which is an allusive hint to a zen story about this farmer who has a bunch of stuff happen to him and despite the good and the bad he always replies with "maybe" rather than "oh yeah, that just sucks" or "I know, I'm so happy!". I find this story very helpful in situations like this. Her pooing was not a nice thing, but after the incident her demeanor started to change for the better. So maybe it was a good thing. Cleaning all that up to the extent that I did is something I need to overcome and work through. So maybe it's a good exercise in letting go and instead of stressing I used the time as walking meditation, trying not to think that my living room was a biohazard area and should be quarantined. I thought more about the water flowing through that wonderful steamer and taking away the yuckiness and trying to well- let go.
* if you are looking for a blog that gets straight to the point and tells the story, this is not the blog for you. I spend A LOT of time having asides, commentary, etc. but I hope it adds to the humor of the post.
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